hindsight is not 20/20. how many times have we looked back and said, “where did things go wrong for us?” we both know how much we fought and screamed and said the most hateful, hurtful things just to see who could make the other one cry first. we weren’t happy then, but we aren’t happy [...]

Sometimes I feel like such a fool, such a jerk, when I talk about my friendships.
He knows better than I do what it means to miss someone. He knows so much more.
I can’t decide if it’s wrong or right, but I feel his sadness and his loss so intensely, I am embarrassed.
He has such strength, [...]

knuckle down, chin up, chest out, shoulders back - don’t let anyone see how scared and sad and lonely you really are. make that smile look convincing, make your laugh sound sincere. when you are the emperor, you get to wear such delightful clothes.
annuals - around your neck
ida maria - oh my god
bodies of [...]

It’s been awhile…apologies for my silence. I never have been very good at keeping track of time.
Now that I’ve had a chance to breathe, think, and tie up many of the loose-ends that have been tugging at my thoughts for months, I’m realizing that I’m missing something huge. It feels bigger than ever now that [...]

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If I take my time, I may retain control. hoping the mold I weave can make things clear, I realize I never had full say in my destiny. windmill flailing, I tumble. I blew my chance. recovering, I analyze how I can make things right the next time. thinking again. if only my thoughts [...]

the romantic heart cannot swim in a calm sea, so it flails and spins madly and without reservation, drowning while keeping itself afloat just enough. i am now afraid of the water - no, not afraid of it, but tired of it. i detest the water and the sea from having exhausted myself in it [...]